Monday, March 15, 2010

Four Doors

In a strange twist of fate, or maybe luck, I was exposed to a social experiment by which I could accurately measure the average level of intelligence of the various staffing in the facility at which I work.

You see there is a walkway between the main building and the cafeteria, and at the end of this path there are 4 doors.

3 of the 4 doors were locked and on one of the locked doors hung a sign reading “Please use other door”.

The first thing I noticed was that everyone who approached this set of doors, went directly to the door with the sign first. I wrote this off as standard curious human behavior, or maybe repetition and absent mindedness.

I then observed a number of people who checked the door anyway, either completely ignoring the sign hanging in clear view or dismissing the plain truth it displayed. At this point I started my idiot total.

Maybe idiot is a bit much …

Tug … tug … tug…

Maybe not…

To give some context to the following you should know that the only other set of doors are at the complete opposite side of the cafeteria. This causes anyone who wishes to enter them to endure a very lengthy walk to reach the other side, which is the exit, and then walk all the way back. Therefore it is obviously advantageous for one to enter through the original doors mentioned.

The next thing I observed was people were very willing to check the second and third doors which were both locked, but reluctant to check the fourth which was unlocked. It was if their brain shut off after two unsuccessful attempts and admitted to defeat. Their spirit had been crushed, disallowing them to check the fourth door and instead take the long walk of shame along the glass exterior of the cafeteria.

A certain margin of error had to be taken into account for my calculations as well. For instance occasionally one or more people would completely forgo checking the door themselves and instead delegate the task to another person. Perhaps they felt the other person was more fitting for the task of door checking, or maybe they were just being polite. Either way delegating such an important task to a member of the general populous bought them a one way ticket to the idiot list.

On other occasions a few lucky people happened to observe another person of higher intelligence discover the open door, thus gaining entrance as a result of someone else’s deduction and reasoning. I found these “piggybackers” to be unacceptable test subjects and eliminated them from the results.

In total only one out of every six subjects observed had the clarity of thought required to gain entrance to the cafeteria through the proper door. 1 in 6. In light of humanities eminent demise, could you hold the door while I grab my paddle?

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